by Kylie Klein:
In the past three months I’ve been teased, spoiled, abandoned, taunted, tricked and courted.
No, I’m not on the bottom rung of the High School pecking order; I’m a Teen Wolf Fan.
As any Wolfie will tell you, the Teen Wolf Hiatus has been an excruciating water torture of information, drip fed to us by MTV with brutal slowness. Don’t even front, MTV, you pack of sadists!
There have been comic convention panels, fan-ish inquisitions on Tumblr, sneak peek videos, ridiculous gifs, teasers and two solid minutes of heart stopping terror (aka the season trailer).
With each new almost!revelation my nerves have been further fried – Stiles is getting a girlfriend? Scott’s getting over Allison? Derek’s new loft has a bed in it? A bed! With actual bed sheets. I’m so confused. I assumed he slept on a nest of rags and washed in a basin of his own tears each morning. What am I supposed to do with this new information?
If the information we’ve been given is anything to go by, this new season is going to make like Peter Hale circa season one, reach into my chest cavity with it’s gnarled claw and rip out my heart.
“This Might Hurt,” MTV warned. You can bet your Mountain Ash infused baseball bat they were grinning maniacally when they said it.
As my dear old Nan used to tell me, forewarned is forearmed. (If only Derek’s were-nan had been a fountain of platitudes like mine, S2 would have been a very different show!) So, here’s my list of the spoilers that shaved years off my young adult life. Pass the smelling salts.
Love is in the air
Stiles Stilinski has been in love with Lydia Martin since third grade. His tragic, unrequited adoration for the ginger bombshell has been one of basic tenants of the show since day one. It’s also one of the thing’s I’ve always really loved about the character – Stiles is as useless at dating as I am. In fact, he’s marginally worse, so he really kept my romantic spirits up, you know?
Well, all that’s set to change this season when, within three minutes of getting on screen, Stiles will be “scrambling for a condom”. Stay classy, Stilinski.
Stiles’ lady – I know, I’m as shocked as you are – love is named Heather, and the story goes he’s been close to her for years. And, yet “Heather” has been suspiciously absent when Stiles was getting the bash from psycho Gramps Argent in S2. I call fair weather friend, Stiles!
Showrunner Jeff Davis said from the beginning we’d never get to see Stiles playing lacrosse (yeah, that went out the window in S2), wolfing out, or kissing a girl. Jeff Davis is a lying liar who lies.
Heather is one of the approximately seven and half thousand new characters Jeff’s cast for the new season.
A cast of seven and a half thousand
There was a point in the winter when there were an average of three new cast members being announced a day. At this stage, there are small towns in the midwest with fewer people than the cast of Teen Wolf.
Some of the key ones include Talia Hale – Derek’s kick ass mom played by Alicia Coppola, a 17-year-old werewolf named Cora played by Adelaide Kane, Alpha badass Deucalion played by Gideon Emery, his major domo Kali played by Krav Magra expert Felisha Terrell, her off sider Ennis played by Brian Patrick Wade and the Alpha twins, Ethan and Aiden played by Max and Charlie Carver. *deep breath*
There’s also a mystery character being played by Zelda Williams, a new teacher at Beacon Hills High who’s going to play a key role, and our old mate Heather.
Shantal Rhodes, the superfan who won a walk-on in season two is back in a regular role, as is Michael Fjordbak who played a young Peter Hale in S2.
Rumor is he’s back for the much anticipated flashback filled ep8 – “Visionary”, in which we also get to see a young, as yet un-devastated Derek Hale and his as yet un-bisected sister Laura, played by Ian Nelson and Ana Walczak. Derek’s dead as a dodo mom Talia will appear in this episode too, as will my tears. Curse you MTV.
In total, 27 new faces will pop up in Beacon Hills. And that’s just in the first half of the season.
Lofty ideas
When we first met the Byronic mess of man-pain that is Derek Hale, he was living in the burnt out shell of the house his entire family died in. I mean, he didn’t even have a TV in there. What the hell was he doing all day? Best bet: crying over the grease spots that were his mom and dad, and doing chin ups. Pathetic.
“We love to hurt Derek!” Jeff Davis has said. No shit.
So when it came out that Derek’s moved to a city loft conversion for season three I was not fooled.
Jeff, however, has said Derek’s loft is favorite of the new sets this season. It has a swish spiral stair case, a big hole in one wall (don’t ask me), and floor to ceiling grubby windows. It also has a bed. For the purposes of romancing, according to Jeff.
We got to see Derek’s brand of loft romancing in the trailer where someone attempts to comfort his sweaty naked shoulder while his voice tells us how utterly useless he is at everything – so hot. An extended trailer that aired at MCM Expo in London apparently confirms that Derek’s Loft of Love is also his Loft of Tears – according to reports it included a shot of Derek on his knees crying while Scott and Stiles look on. Oh Derek.
I can’t help feeling like Derek’s living situation has always been a short hand for Derek’s state of mind – from the charred, tumble down ruins of Hale House to the grubby, neglected misery of the abandoned train depot in season two. So, if the entire building doesn’t end up a pile of bricks and suffering by the ep24 I’m going to feel cheated.
Redemption song
Allison Argent – played with consumate grace by Chrystal Reed – needs some redeeming after her emotional melt down last season.
I mean, she shot Boyd. A lot.
This season will find her trying to go Zen and leave her life of brutally pin-cushioning her classmates with arrows behind her.
But surely Jeff Davis didn’t spend two seasons setting Allison up as the badass to beat them all, only to have her hang up her bow for good? I can’t wait to see who she shoots the hell out of next.
Thin White Deucalion
The arbiter of Derek’s suffering this season is undoubtedly going to be Deucalion, leader of the Alpha pack that left their weirdly Nazi-lite mark on the end of S2. The top dog’s velvet menace was all over the trailer, in particular demanding Derek make mince meat of his pack in order to join Deuc’s. Rude.
It’s hard to tell for the 2.3 seconds he’s been on screen so far just how much of a Disney Villan Deuc’s going to be – but one shock revelation was teased out of the clip – It looks like Deucalion is blind. This might seem like no big thing, but it actually turns everything we know about were’s freaky healing powers on its head. If the baddest of the baddest can’t heal his eyes, does that mean there’s something out there even more scary than an invincible supernatural critter? (No, I don’t think it’s Greenberg’s socks.)
Mama McCall
Scott’s mom, and to date the only actual adult who knows what the hell is going on with the kids, appears to get her throat ripped out in the trailer. I think fandom is still trying to come to terms with it. Either that or, like me, they put their fingers in their ears, close their eyes and go LA LA LA LA LAAAA until that bit’s finished. Mama McCall can’t die. I will not allow it.
Oh Danny Boy
Three words: Gay. Sex. Scene. Jeff Davis has said that in the magical world of Beacon Hills there is no homophobia. So to balance out all the hetero romping that went on last season – thanks Scott and Allison – Danny’s getting a wolfy love interest in the form of Alpha Ethan. And in the spirit of equality, they’re getting their kits off, and their freaks on, in the name of art.
I dunno, but I thought there was a little gay eye-sex going on between Derek and Stiles last season, but I guess I’m the only one who saw it. Weird.
Anyway, Danny’s a great character – his wit is dryer than the Mojave – and it’s going to be interesting to see what happens to him, and how little he has to wear when it does, in the next 12 episodes.
Danny’s last name, Mahealani, is Hawaiian for full moon, and that it’s going to play a part in the season. The trailer shows him being wheeling in to the ER on a Gurney. He spent half of his time in S2 on a gurney also. Basically what I’m trying to say is MTV have been particularly stingy with details on Danny’s story arc this season. That has got to be relevant. *Pulls on conspiracy theory hat*
Hotel California
Ep6 will be called “Hotel California” and showrunner Jeff Davis has said it was the darkest episode they’ve ever done.
“I expected them to push back on that one because it’s so dark,” he said. They didn’t. Because, as we’ve already established, they want us to cry.
Dylan O’Brien – Stiles – co-wrote a scene from the episode with Jeff, a scene which Tyler Posey – Scott – later said made him cry when he read it. It will involve Stiles “talking Scott of a ledge” in a motel apparently. Which is all very well, but who’s going to talk me off the ledge after I watch the episode, huh? Didn’t think of that, did you Dylan? My number is 555 8380. You’d better call.
Water, water everywhere
Water is a major motif this season – Scott’s teaser trailer showed him, disturbingly, drowning himself. Beta sweetheart Isaac’s teaser showed him being dunked in a bath of ice water and at the MCM Expo, there was a clip of rogue beta Boyd being similarly doused. Producer and co-writer Christian Taylor said the production had been pretty wet so far. Yeah, I’m just gonna leave that one there.
Holding on for a hero
Heart of the show Scott McCall has pretty much been a victim of fate since the show started. But this season will see him strap a pair on, and level-up. Naturally that means riding a motorbike and forswearing romance, at least until ep10 – according to Tyler Posey.
It’s actually pretty great to hear Scott’s main aim this season is to be “better” – a better student, friend and shapeshifting monster of the night.
In the trailers so far we’ve seen him drowning himself – a gut churning metaphor for moving on if ever there was one – and chillingly, turning his beta gold eyes Alpha red, seemingly by will alone.
Scott’s fate has always been to step up, leave childhood behind – way before his years – and become the top dog in Beacon Hills. I can’t wait to see it.
And it all kicks off on June 3, when Teen Wolf: S3 premieres.
A comprehensive list of season three spoilers compiled by Tumblr user Windycitygirl39 is amazing. MTV’s top 25 spoilers are here. And the 8 major ones, according to Zap2It.com, are here.
The two minute trailer of doom is here.
The two minute clip of Stiles, Stiles’ new hair, and Lydia being attacked by birds is here.
DarkMedia contributor Kylie Klein covers Teen Wolf. She’s passionate about pop culture – from classic Doctor Who to the DC Multi-verse and everything in between. In her spare time she wrangles gore and produces movies with Typhoid Films. Follow her on Twitter at @KokoKabana and check out her blog at tiny.cc/popassassin.
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